Ref.No.TAF/001/DO                                          Tuesday 25 October 2011

To
Sardar Mandeep Singh (PPS)
The Deputy Superintendent of Police (DSP)
Police Station,
Qila Sarai, Sultanpur Lodhi,
Kapurthala, Punjab 144626

Subject: The case of 3 delicious cookies and a glass of adulterated apple-juice.

Dear DSP Saheb,
Sat Sri Akal!
With reference to our wonderful meeting at your office yesterday where I was served with a glass of diluted apple juice (for healthy reasons only – thank you for the recipe:-) and 3 delicious cookies, I would like to place on record the following grievances against a very serious social and racial discrimination meted against me (a guru–ka dhadhi-mirasi) by you in your good offices:

  1. That you dare to gift yourself with such delicious cookies (3 varieties) and only shared a paltry 3 with me (1 variety only).
  2. That you dared mix water in my juice and not a soda.

I implore you that serious action must be taken immediately against my erring DSP, Sultanpur Lodhi and a severe penalty imposed upon him – ahem, I mean, you.
Honorable DSP Saheb, I have also suggestions regarding the kind of stringent punishment that you must inflict upon your good offices, which are as follows:

  1. At least 500 grams each of all three varieties of cookies currently under ‘litigation’ to be hand-delivered to me.
  2. At least one glass of apple juice with a good quality soda to be served to me at my earliest convenience.

I would also like to tell you, my honorable DSP, given the severity of offence committed (by you), inflicting an unquantifiable mental stress (upon me), that a very passionate and persuasive appeal against you will be made to the honorable SSP, Kapurthala, if by the evening the sentence is not carried out.
Thanking you in anticipation and hoping for an immediate redressal.
With warm regards,
Yours sincerely,
Bhai Baldeep Singh

Executive Board Member (Punjab) of the National Sangeet Natak Akademi, New Delhi & Member of the three Advisory Committees of the National Sangeet Natak Akademi: Archives & Documentation, Music and Grants
Founder and Chairman, The Anad Foundation, New Delhi
Member, Sultanpur Lodhi Development Board
Member of the Library Committee, Anandpur Sahib Foundation

PS: In case of inaction, copies will be sent to:

  1. Deputy Commissioner, Kapurthala
  2. Senior Superintendent of Police, Kapurthala
  3. SDM, Sultanpur Lodhi